Brotherly Love, Relief, and …..Truth…..Always Truth

By James C. “Chris” Williams, IV, Staff Writer - The Profound Pontifications of Brother John Deacon

I have learned in my old age (and sometimes the hard way) that some things are just meant to be.  Or as my Dad would say…”It is what it is” or if he was especially philosophic “if it is inevitable, relax and go with it.”  At any rate I have decided that John being a big part of my life IS inevitable so I might as well relax and go with it.  It’s a good thing that I like him because if I didn’t, it would be really bad cause he seems to show up everywhere I go. 

Pam and I had been invited to one of her co-worker’s wedding.  It was being held on an old ranch about an hour’s drive north through the beautiful Texas Hill Country.  It wasn’t a big wedding, but it wasn’t small either with about a hundred people there.  The weather could not have been better for the outdoor wedding and everything was, as Pam whispered to me while wiping away tears, “absolutely beautiful.”  I gazed around at the guests and saw that almost all the ladies were teary-eyed too.  That’s when I saw him.  I was shocked that I hadn’t seen John before as big as he is.  He must have come in just as everything got started.  As I watched him, the big softy quickly swiped a tear away while glancing around to make sure no one saw.  But I saw him and then he saw me and I winked at him.  His face turned a little red as his surprised expression turned to a scowl.  Soon we were filing out and headed over to the big barn for the reception. 

As it turned out, everyone had assigned tables and seats.  John and Mrs. Deacon were friends of the groom, and Pam and I were friends of the bride, so John was at one end of the barn, and I was at the other.  Pam and I went over and said hi to John and Mrs. Deacon and chatted while we were waiting for the wedding party to finish with pictures and arrive at the barn.  Pretty soon they all showed up, and the formal introductions were made to everyone.  There was a D.J. setting up to play music and make announcements;  apparently, there was going to be dancing. 

I could see John fidgeting while they were bringing out the food for the buffet.  I was betting that they didn’t know how much John can eat.  Finally they had it all out there and announced that we were going to go to the buffet by tables, and as far away as I was I could see the horror on John’s face when his table was not first to go.  I could also see Mrs. Deacon giving him the “eye” and trying to get him to relax.  I already knew that was not going to work as did she, but she was doing her best.  The D.J. who had the microphone was given the task of choosing which table went next, and after the third table was allowed to go and John’s wasn’t it, I saw John motion the D.J. over.  He motioned for him to lean down so John could whisper in his ear, and he did with a smile on his face.  The smile quickly vanished, and a look of fear and concern replaced it as he quickly announced that John’s table was next.  John was at the buffet table in a flash and filled a plate with much more than it was engineered to hold.  Using the two-handed under the plate hold, he managed to get it back to the table without losing anything.  There were chicken tacos and chalupas and salad and queso and chips.  It was not exactly John’s kind of food but even worse it sure looked like there was not going to be near enough.  He was looking to go back for seconds even before the last table got to go the first time.  I could tell he was in distress.  By the time I finished eating I had lost him.  I thought he had left but I could see Mrs. Deacon still at their table so I got up and started looking for him.  Predictably I found him behind the barn helping the cooks at the grill cook some more chicken.  Everyone was happy.  The cooks because they had some help even though he ate half of what he cooked and John because he was eating as he was cooking but no one seemed to care much.  He and I talked as he cooked… ate until we all got called in to the start of the normal reception stuff. 

The bride and groom cut the cake, and the best man and maid of honor gave their speeches and toasts and then the dance started.  Right away John was out there dancing with his wife until she got tired and because there were more women than men on the dance floor he danced with most all of them continuously for what seemed like a good hour or so.  Finally I saw him sit down for a breather at his table in the front.  Shortly I saw him making his way to the bar for a bottle of water and I caught his eye and waved him over. 

“Sit down here and rest a while,” I said as he plopped into a chair that was not designed to hold him.  “Thanks,” he gasped as he swigged the water.  “I was about to pass out up there.  Those ladies wouldn’t let me stop.”  I laughed and told him to look around at all the tables with nothing but men sitting at them.  “That’s why you get stuck up there my Brother.  All their husbands don’t or won’t dance so they look for a guy that can and will.  Just hide out back here for a while and catch your breath before they find you.” 

As he sat there his breathing got back to normal and we got to talking about our Lodges and stuff and he told me that he was struggling with something that had happened in his Lodge and asked if he could ask me a question,” hypothetically.”  I told him it was hypothetically and he rolled his eyes and said “whatever” and went right on.  “Brother Chris, What would you do if a Brother lied to you?   I said.  “I don’t know if I could tolerate that.  Other than being just plain wrong, it is a violation of his obligation as a Mason.  That is pretty bad for sure.”  “I agree a hundred percent,” he said softly as his emotions started kicking in.  “But it happened in my Lodge and it’s tearing me up just thinking about it.  This stabs in the very heart the three main tenets of our Craft, Brotherly Love, Relief and Truth.  Now we can all pretty much agree that Brotherly Love is probably the most important tenet of Masonry because everything flows from it and back to it.  Just as I would do anything, including giving my life for my family, my love for my Brother  solidifies within me that I would do whatever in my power to relieve him  of pain or suffering including giving my life for him.  He is my Brother and we are bound by a tie that should never be broken.  It is a bond strengthened by respect and trust and the knowledge that what I feel for him he feels for me.  Now, Relief is a big part of Brotherly Love, and it is not so much the giving of charity in a financial sense as much as it is being a friend, being a supporter, a confidant, a Brother who will help aid and assist any of his Brethren in times of need or distress.  But in my opinion if Brotherly Love is the greatest of our principals and relief is a product of that Brotherly Love then truth has to be the glue or cement that holds it all together.  Yes, I know that the tenet of truth is about searching for Truth…those profound Truths of life….but it is also about being a good and true Brother, an upright and loyal Brother.  It means speaking the truth and standing for the truth even when it hurts.  Without truth, there is nothing.  A man who takes an obligation as a Mason and deals in deceit and untruthfulness is nothing but a hypocrite.  A man like this cannot walk in the light that is Freemasonry.  A shadow will always follow him and his growth as a Mason cannot continue.” 

His voice had strengthened and weakened several times as he talked and had trailed off with sadness as he finished.  I felt really bad for him because I understood the hurt he was feeling.  To be lied to by a Brother was the ultimate betrayal and I knew as he did that deceit and hypocrisy has no place in our fraternity.  “What are you going to do John,” I asked finally.  He shook his head and said, “I am going to whisper good council in his ear and see what happens.  I am saddened by what he has done but it seems that the attitude of this world we live in is that no one will take responsibility for their actions including this Brother.   It seems to infect everyone.  It is actually accepted to lie about anything anywhere and hope the truth never comes out.  We can’t even trust our leaders to tell us the truth.  Lying nowadays is not even looked upon with contempt….  instead, lies are given justification.  It seems that society promotes lying and accepts it and those who seek the truth are looked upon as outcasts and those who act and speak the truth are somehow considered weak.  As for this Brother, he has violated my trust and the trust of every Brother Mason.  Masonry has always stood for the truth.  Lies and deceit fog the mind and stunt intellectual growth.  It kills character and destroys reputations.  My Dad used to say that the truth was the truth.  You can try to distort it, you can water it down, you can try to make it look like something else, or you can flat out deny it but in the end, you cannot change it because the truth is still the truth.  The thing is that if he is a good man then he should be hurting worse than I am and I will try to help him see the light if I can.  I still believe that in most instances a Brother who has taken the wrong path can be led back to the right one.  I hope it is true of this Brother.  Brother Chris, please tell your Brothers that Masons have to be about the truth above all else, otherwise all will be lost” “So Mote it be,” was all I could say.  “Brother John you are right as rain as usual.”  It was lucky I had the presence of mind to recognize that this was something I needed to remember so I had jotted notes on a used (hope it was mine) napkin and felt like I had a sure enough John article. 

Just as I was going to ask him another question I heard a giggle from behind me and I turned to see three ladies standing there.  One of them said to John in a teasing voice, “Mrs. Deacon said that you really want to come back up there and dance with us….now don’t you?  Tell the truth now.”  They all kinda raised their eyebrows and smiled.  I saw him look towards the front table where Mrs. Deacon was sitting and I saw her nod ever so slightly.  John looked back at the girls and then at me and a little grin started and got bigger as he said, “Brother Chris…..the truth is, I love you my Brother but I gotta go dance now. 

I grabbed him as he started to follow the ladies to the dance floor and said, “John you have to tell me what you told the D. J. that made him let your table go to the buffet.”  He let out a whoop and said, “He didn’t know that I was the Groom’s Brother and paying him for the evening, and when I told him that for every table that got to go before ours I would deduct ten dollars from his pay, he got really serious.  He figured he had already lost thirty bucks.”  With that he gave me a big John bear hug and off he went.  Pam and I got ready to leave and went up to say goodbye to Mrs. Deacon and I waved at John as we left.  I remember thinking that he was probably going to sleep really good that night.  Y’all remember to tell the truth and say your prayers.